Friday, July 16, 2010

Family and Love: The Hell Days of Hidayuki

Ohayo gozaimasu!!
Hidayuki desu!

Recently, I watched Romeo X Juliet on Animax.
I was touched... ( T ^ T )
Even until the very end of his life, Romeo did his best to to protect the one he love, Juliet. And Juliet, kept the promise she made with Romeo : to be together no matter life or death.

such a pure love... sugoii na? (^.^)
I found a quote while watching the last episode:
"Hatred and revenge...all thise can be cured by one thing: LOVE"

It made me thought:
Aside of my parents and siblings, will love ever appear in the hearts of my uncles and aunties? and grandmother? and grandfather too?



My heart is in confusion...
my family.. is breaking apart now.
( u _ u )

Since I was sick, and my parents are both working,
I have to stay at home, alone.
I could have just go to my grandmother's house...
but I don't want to.

It's because:
1. grandma's house is pretty noisy - my other siblings and little cousins are the masters of noisiness.
2. although they are my family, I don't want to trouble them.

and there the trouble start... on the faithful 08.07.2010, Thursday~

Aunty Lina called me:
"Key, come here(grandma's house) would you? Your grandmother and I are heading to downtown for a bit. Someone need to look after the house. Your grandmother's sister is here.Someone need to *keep an eye* to her."

What the hell...?! I'm sick myself...have some compassion, onegai?!

I refused, but she used my siblings as another excuse... "then at least babysit your brother and sister here while we're gone. Just for today, Key."

I accepted to go there... just for siblings.

But you know, they never manage to go to town that day because of the weather. The weather was all dark and windy.
And so, they held capture me until Friday.

They finally went to town the next day. But they still want me to stay.
"We'll take care of you" is what they said to me.

I thought since they're my family, it's okay to follow what they said... for now.
However, I noticed there's something wrong with me.
I was healthy back at home... but when I'm at grandma's place,
I got worse!

My fever never goes down...
The chicken pox appears more... (which is good, I think)
The chicken pox got all swallon
IT WAS HELL!

I got worse...they decided to take me to the hospital on Friday night.
and it was the same night, I got *hospitalized*...
I over do myself... acting all cheerful,
caused me to stay at the cold ward for a few hours.

On Saturday,
I got stuck on bed all day.
I was *too sick to even change position while laying down*.

And on Sunday,
the hell days end...in *the worst way*.
my grandmother, the one who've been taking care of me,
was busy with... well, family crisis.

And so, I relied on my uncles and aunties for help...
not much of big help, just to get my drinks and meal~
(things I can't get inside of the room)
And *to wipe my back ONLY*... since I couldn't do it myself.

I didn't know behind their smile,
*their fake smile*, they were actually annoyed and fed up...
fed up of taking care of the sick Hidayuki.

Eventually,
my uncle and aunties plot... well, type a *veeerrrryyyy rude message* to my mother.
The message was:
"Ooooh....Mila!! When are you coming here? You have children, remember? Mother is broke already, and Key need to be fed. Aunty Mia (my grandmother's sister) was also looking for you. Come here, would you? It's Sunday...how come you're still busy all day?!"

Mother was out to prepare something for the trip to Kuala Lumpur this Monday.
And the message...it caused a *great big fight* to our family.
I was treated on purpose:
*to BOMB my parents and to draw us out of the house*.

I was too sick when they fought each other...
all I can do is hear.
until it's time for us to back off...mom said to me:
"Key, if you feel like dying you should have tell us!"

That time, I broke into tears:
was is too much to look after a sick child?
I didn't ask to be this sick...
is death is the only way for me to end this hell-like sickness?
am I that *troublesome*?

THEN WHY DID MOTHER BRING ME TO THIS WORLD ANYWAY?!

I broke down...until a warm hand reached out to me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Saa!!! ( ^ . ^ )
I'll talk about *THAT warm hand* in my next entry~ <3

Now you know what's been up to me lately... (^ ^)

thank you for reading this long entry~



♀key♂

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